Package Two: Pre-Marriage Contract Workshop
★★★★★ Testimonial Pre-Marriage Counselling 2022
We should have done a pre-marital agreement long ago. I can see that now. I was of the mindset to leave, but one hour turned it around for us. We negotiated our personal time and even had a contingency plan for when things went wrong. Our homework was to fill in a full agreement covering all the other points we did not cover in session and to stick this on the back of a cupboard door. We both agree this session was nothing like what we expected. Thank you Ghita. - Jessica & Andrew. (Hope Island Gold Coast)
A Preparation Course for Relationship Harmony: Negotiating Expectations, Deal-Breakers, Intimacy, Resolving Conflict and more...
Designed as a Pre-Marriage Preparation Course, our three intensive hour workshop has helped engaged couples (or those exploring the possibility of moving in together) to build strong foundations for their future going forwards. During these sessions we uncover the unspoken issues and potential hurdles to a happy united marriage. No other Couples Counsellor on the Gold Coast does this in a 3 hour session.
Happily Ever After...
Is Pre-Marital Counselling Common?
Yes, it has become a pivotal moment for couples moving in together and getting married in Australia. Following from trends in the USA (from originally church designed courses), couples find that there is much less to negotiate or disagree about when a pre-marital contract is hanging inside the wardrobe door.
Certainly, marriage is a big investment (emotionally and financially), and failure comes at a high cost.
Divorce Statistics Australia (2016 - Bureau of Statistics):
A Happy Marriage Builds Upon... (Gottman & Silver, 1999):
How Long Does it Take?
The average time couples spend in pre-marital counselling before getting married is 3-5 hours. This can be done in a 3 hour workshop.
Is This Course Suitable for Same Sex Couples?
Yes. All couples will find these negotiations prior to a wedding or moving in together helpful.
Designed as a Pre-Marriage Preparation Course, our three intensive hour workshop has helped engaged couples (or those exploring the possibility of moving in together) to build strong foundations for their future going forwards. During these sessions we uncover the unspoken issues and potential hurdles to a happy united marriage. No other Couples Counsellor on the Gold Coast does this in a 3 hour session.
Happily Ever After...
Is Pre-Marital Counselling Common?
Yes, it has become a pivotal moment for couples moving in together and getting married in Australia. Following from trends in the USA (from originally church designed courses), couples find that there is much less to negotiate or disagree about when a pre-marital contract is hanging inside the wardrobe door.
- Did you know that 44% of couples who get married today agree to pre-marital counselling? A pre-marital counsellor will, ultimately, tailor the questions and sessions to your unique situation and relationship – and give you the space to discuss with the guidance of a non-judgmental third party.
- Marital research has shown a 30% lower rate of divorce in couples who have participated in pre-marital counselling and a strong marriage positively affects a person’s level of happiness, physical health and emotional well-being for years.
Certainly, marriage is a big investment (emotionally and financially), and failure comes at a high cost.
Divorce Statistics Australia (2016 - Bureau of Statistics):
- 1 in 3 marriages (33%) end in divorce
- The peak of the divorce rate was at 4 years
- 77% of couples co-habitate before marriage
- Up to 65% of second marriages end in divorce (And that does not include de Facto statistics)
A Happy Marriage Builds Upon... (Gottman & Silver, 1999):
- Friendship rather than fighting (Deep friendship is at the heart of the marriage).
- Seeing the good in your partner (Giving them the benefit of the doubt)
- High levels of trust and total commitment maintain the relationship.
- Capacity to repair (A healthy companionship supports repair following disagreements and conflict).
- Marriage purpose (A partnership has a purpose, where each supports the other’s hopes and dreams).
How Long Does it Take?
The average time couples spend in pre-marital counselling before getting married is 3-5 hours. This can be done in a 3 hour workshop.
Is This Course Suitable for Same Sex Couples?
Yes. All couples will find these negotiations prior to a wedding or moving in together helpful.
Pre-Marriage Counselling Testimonial: We got married! Ghita, thank you so much for what you have done for our family!" Mr & Mrs Lees (Pre-Marital Couples Counselling, Currumbin Waters).
In Pre-Marriage Counselling Couples Learn Marital Resilience:
Respected as one of the best Couples Counsellors on the Gold Coast, Family Counsellor Ghita Andersen will take you on a journey to help you flourish in the important topics that you both select from the following...
Respected as one of the best Couples Counsellors on the Gold Coast, Family Counsellor Ghita Andersen will take you on a journey to help you flourish in the important topics that you both select from the following...
- Love Languages
- Handling Finances
- Unrealistic Expectations
- Communication and Conflict Resoution
- Beliefs, Values and Standards
- Marriage Roles (Role Expectations) and Responsibilities
- Affection, Sex and Intimacy
- Children and Parenting
- Extended Family Relationships
- Decision Making
- Life Dreams and Goals
- Household Chore Division
- Social Life
- Holidays
- Relationship 'Deal Breakers' (Extra-marital Affairs etc.)
Certainty Before the Big Day
If you are concerned already that you have some glitches in your relationship, that’s not necessarily a reason to avoid getting married. Don’t give up until you have invited a pre-marital counsellor to look at the blind spots that might need fine tuning to help you feel confident in your connection.
Many couples encounter some typical upsets during their engagement that simply require:
Successful Pre-Marriage Counselling
Based on our experience, the most successful clients attend every appointment; so make your appointments a priority.
PRE-MARRIAGE COUNSELLING WORKSHOP:
3 Hour Pre-Marital Preparation Workshop: $550 ($50 Bonus Value)
- Includes a negotiated points contract written by you both
You Will Learn to:
HOUR 1: Write your Pre-Marital Agreement
HOUR 2: Learn Your Love Languages and Rituals for Intimacy
HOUR 3: Learn to Resolve Conflict
If you are concerned already that you have some glitches in your relationship, that’s not necessarily a reason to avoid getting married. Don’t give up until you have invited a pre-marital counsellor to look at the blind spots that might need fine tuning to help you feel confident in your connection.
Many couples encounter some typical upsets during their engagement that simply require:
- Learning better ways to talk about conflicts
- Agreeing to call timeouts until you both can be more objective in solving problems
- Making sure that you are “getting your partner” and vice versa
- Appreciating your cultural differences
- Grasping the best ways to deal with potential differing in-law expectations
- Moving out of singlehood into habits that build secure marriages
- Dealing with any concerns about
- Verbal or physical abuse
- Potential alcohol or drug abuse
- Problematic withdrawal patterns.
Successful Pre-Marriage Counselling
Based on our experience, the most successful clients attend every appointment; so make your appointments a priority.
- Be willing to take risks and try new things. (You are going to learn new skills, some of which may seem unfamiliar at first. Commit to trying them out.)
- Prepare for each session. (This is a vital opportunity for your marriage; take it. Come prepared with a list of what you want to discuss and any changes since the last session.)
- Provide direct and honest feedback. Be open and honest about what is, and what still needs work.
PRE-MARRIAGE COUNSELLING WORKSHOP:
3 Hour Pre-Marital Preparation Workshop: $550 ($50 Bonus Value)
- Includes a negotiated points contract written by you both
You Will Learn to:
HOUR 1: Write your Pre-Marital Agreement
- Explore and list your expectations of the relationship over time
- Marriage Roles (husband / wife role expectations), Values, Chores, Deal Breakers, Parental Responsibilities, Family, Culture etc.
HOUR 2: Learn Your Love Languages and Rituals for Intimacy
- Develop rituals that deepen your sense of closeness
- Identify effective strategies for affair protection
- Learn about the Marriage Jar: Work on the marriage
- Come to understand your partner’s Love Language for experiencing affirmation from you.
- Develop a freedom to talk about your sexual intimacy together
HOUR 3: Learn to Resolve Conflict
- Communicate effectively
- NEGOTIATE: Learn to negotiate your needs in a good way to reduce fighting dramatically: Eg: Reflective Listening
- Learn about a united teamwork: Lean in not away: Speak with heart not the ego
Happy Customer Feedback:
★★★★★ Pre-Marital Couples Counselling Testimonial: "Since seeing you last week things have been great and it looks like we are back on track. We have connected amazingly over the weekend. Thank you." Ryan and Kimberly (Elanora).
★★★★★ 5 Star Google Review: Marriage Counselling: 3 Step Package 2023:
Ghita provided real strategies that can be implemented to prevent conflict and more empathy within our relationships. We were able to be truthful and honest within ourselves from better self reflection and then she gave us the tools to be able to communicate our needs effectively. We both learnt how to actively listen to one another and remember the other person's needs are different. Ghita was absolutely warm and welcoming, would definitely recommend her intensive 3 Step Program, it has saved our marriage. - Nicole Eggleton (Coomera).
About Your Therapist
Passionate about helping marriages and regarded as one of the most effective Couples Counsellors on the Gold Coast, Ghita Andersen (B.Soc.Sci: Psych & Coun; Grad Cert FDR) has an edge over most couples counsellors in that she is also a Federally Accredited Family Dispute Resolution Mediator.
Because Couples Counselling is a personal process, it is important to remember that there is an initial free 10 minute phone consultation available. Don't be afraid to reach out and ask questions. Call us today at Ghita Therapy Counselling Gold Coast on 0439888070, or alternatively, check availability and book easily online 24 hours on the booking tab below.
Select 'Package Two: Pre-Marriage Contract Workshop - 3 Hours' under Couples Counselling on the booking system.
Passionate about helping marriages and regarded as one of the most effective Couples Counsellors on the Gold Coast, Ghita Andersen (B.Soc.Sci: Psych & Coun; Grad Cert FDR) has an edge over most couples counsellors in that she is also a Federally Accredited Family Dispute Resolution Mediator.
Because Couples Counselling is a personal process, it is important to remember that there is an initial free 10 minute phone consultation available. Don't be afraid to reach out and ask questions. Call us today at Ghita Therapy Counselling Gold Coast on 0439888070, or alternatively, check availability and book easily online 24 hours on the booking tab below.
Select 'Package Two: Pre-Marriage Contract Workshop - 3 Hours' under Couples Counselling on the booking system.
Case Study: JUSTIN AND AESHA: A story of different values
Justin and Aesha have known each other for about 1 year and been dating for about six months. Although they come from vastly different cultures, her family is Indian and his family is Anglo-Australian, they are deeply in love and plan to get married. Since they have not known each other a very long time, friends and family have suggested that a premarital counselling would be a good idea before they make any final commitment to each other.
As Justin and Aesha attend their workshop, they are both a bit anxious. They have never attended therapy or counselling and do not know what to expect. As they meet their pre-marriage counsellor for the first time, they are happy to find that they have a good rapport with Ghita and she is easy to talk to. Justin and Aesha are particularly assured after she carefully explains how she works with couples and her policy of ‘no secrets’ during the couples counselling process.
Aesha and Justin each talk about their experience of growing up, about family expectations around spiritual and religious beliefs and their values. Although Justin has spent time with Aesha’s family, he is surprised at the degree to which Aesha feels strongly about her Hindu religious beliefs and that she wants her children to have the benefit of everyday rituals. On the other hand, when Justin thinks of his own haphazard Anglican upbringing he admits to feeling a bit intimidated.
In the pre-marital plan, Ghita suggests that Justin and Aesha consider making an agreement regarding the religious upbringing of their children. At first, Justin and Aesha thought the suggestion was a little premature, however after some discussion, they both acknowledged that the issue of children and religion was hugely significant, especially to Aesha, and that one of the reasons they had decided to come to premarriage counselling in the first place was to address any major issues that might come up.
Consequently, a resolution about some of the big issues proved to be extremely difficult and fraught with emotion for both Aesha and Justin, and they were glad they had Ghita’s assistance to work through the problem. Yet through these discussions, Justin also discovered that if they made a decision to raise their children in the Hindu tradition, their decision would have ramifications for Justin and his family.
Through a budgeting exercise, Aesha and Justin come to realise that their approach to finances is vastly different: The couple are both given $1,000 in pretend money and they have to budget and spend the funds. Aesha happily and easily spends almost all of the money with only $7 left over, while Justin finds that he wants to save the majority of the money and only spend what he has to on necessary budgetary items like housing, utilities and paying bills. The difference is both surprising and a bit startling.
Ghita realises that the value differences between her clients is quite substantial, but she uses exercises and role play activities in the third hour to help them to reframe their differences into strengths. Ghita also helps the couple to discuss how they might each be able to compromise in relation to some of these value and cultural differences, and works with them to enhance their Reflective Listening Skills so that discussing potential compromises in the future can come more easily. To this end, they receive homework to do to carry-on what they have learned in session.
Working with Ghita allowed Aesha and Justin to reach an honest and open awareness of each of their needs and develop true empathy for each other’s cultural needs. Counselling helped them to reach a compromise about future situations, and even more importantly, they both felt really hopeful about their future together.
* Names altered.
Justin and Aesha have known each other for about 1 year and been dating for about six months. Although they come from vastly different cultures, her family is Indian and his family is Anglo-Australian, they are deeply in love and plan to get married. Since they have not known each other a very long time, friends and family have suggested that a premarital counselling would be a good idea before they make any final commitment to each other.
As Justin and Aesha attend their workshop, they are both a bit anxious. They have never attended therapy or counselling and do not know what to expect. As they meet their pre-marriage counsellor for the first time, they are happy to find that they have a good rapport with Ghita and she is easy to talk to. Justin and Aesha are particularly assured after she carefully explains how she works with couples and her policy of ‘no secrets’ during the couples counselling process.
Aesha and Justin each talk about their experience of growing up, about family expectations around spiritual and religious beliefs and their values. Although Justin has spent time with Aesha’s family, he is surprised at the degree to which Aesha feels strongly about her Hindu religious beliefs and that she wants her children to have the benefit of everyday rituals. On the other hand, when Justin thinks of his own haphazard Anglican upbringing he admits to feeling a bit intimidated.
In the pre-marital plan, Ghita suggests that Justin and Aesha consider making an agreement regarding the religious upbringing of their children. At first, Justin and Aesha thought the suggestion was a little premature, however after some discussion, they both acknowledged that the issue of children and religion was hugely significant, especially to Aesha, and that one of the reasons they had decided to come to premarriage counselling in the first place was to address any major issues that might come up.
Consequently, a resolution about some of the big issues proved to be extremely difficult and fraught with emotion for both Aesha and Justin, and they were glad they had Ghita’s assistance to work through the problem. Yet through these discussions, Justin also discovered that if they made a decision to raise their children in the Hindu tradition, their decision would have ramifications for Justin and his family.
Through a budgeting exercise, Aesha and Justin come to realise that their approach to finances is vastly different: The couple are both given $1,000 in pretend money and they have to budget and spend the funds. Aesha happily and easily spends almost all of the money with only $7 left over, while Justin finds that he wants to save the majority of the money and only spend what he has to on necessary budgetary items like housing, utilities and paying bills. The difference is both surprising and a bit startling.
Ghita realises that the value differences between her clients is quite substantial, but she uses exercises and role play activities in the third hour to help them to reframe their differences into strengths. Ghita also helps the couple to discuss how they might each be able to compromise in relation to some of these value and cultural differences, and works with them to enhance their Reflective Listening Skills so that discussing potential compromises in the future can come more easily. To this end, they receive homework to do to carry-on what they have learned in session.
Working with Ghita allowed Aesha and Justin to reach an honest and open awareness of each of their needs and develop true empathy for each other’s cultural needs. Counselling helped them to reach a compromise about future situations, and even more importantly, they both felt really hopeful about their future together.
* Names altered.
Copyright Ghita Andersen 2023. Images by Freepik. #pre-maritalcounselling #pre-marriagecounsellinggoldcoast
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